notfaking_it | March 12

Eames was gone and Lily was drunk.

For all she knew, he'd been gone for days now; she didn't see him so often that missing him for a few days was cause for alarm. But it had been longer than a few days now, longer than felt right and when she'd gone by his hut earlier, it had been empty. It was more than his things being gone, though, and she couldn't put words to the real emptiness left behind, but it was enough.

Eames was gone and so Lily had gotten drunk.

She'd hardly been in love with him, but she'd liked him. Their friendship had been important to her and it had become even more important recently, with the things he'd told her, the parts of his life he'd been willing to share. She certainly hadn't minded sleeping with him either, but that was far from the only reason she'd liked being around him.

And now he was gone.

She'd gone to the Winchester and it was only now, stumbling away from it that she realized she'd taken her last drink with her, glass and all. Eventually she'd have to return it, but she had come too far and was too close to Jeff's to turn back now. It was only within the last few minutes that she'd even realized she was going to Jeff. There were several people she'd considered going to; Nina, of course, even Sawyer, but in the end she'd found herself walking toward Jeff's.

She knew where she stood with Jeff. It was easy with him, uncomplicated, and that was why she found herself standing in front of his hut, a drink in one hand, the other rapping softly at his door. It was late, but she hoped he was still awake.

And if he wasn't, she was going to wake him up.

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"Thank you," Lily said, stepping past Jeff into the hut, laying her free hand briefly on his arm as she passed. He was warm enough, real enough. On the way over here, she'd had a moment of complete unreality, trying to reconcile the idea of being on a magical island where people could simply appear and disappear. Maybe she'd taken the wrong drug, ended up in some hospital somewhere, imagining all of this.

But Jeff was real.

"Were you sleeping?" she asked, turning back to face him once she was inside. "Sorry if I woke you up. I wasn't sure if you'd still be awake."

"Just relaxing. Another boring night on the island," he explained as Chang headed over to sniff at her feet, his tag wagging furiously. Jeff rolled his eyes, but he didn't toss the dog into the room he usually locked him in during the night or when he went out without him. Soon, though. Instead, he sat on the wooden couch in the room, giving her ample room to join him if she wanted to. "Until now, apparently. What brings you over this way?"

Something was off. He didn't need her to say so for him to know. Whether she actually wanted to talk about it was up to her, even though he knew he wouldn't be much help, was up to her.

Briefly, Lily dropped into a crouch to pet the dog, finding it easier to focus on him than on Jeff. The room felt a little bit like it was spinning and she had to close her eyes for a moment, resting her hand on the dog lightly before she stood again and crossed the room to sit beside Jeff. It was a good question, one she wasn't entirely sure she had an answer for.

She'd come here because Eames was gone. Though that didn't make much sense.

"Someone disappeared," she settled on saying. "I got really drunk and coming over here seemed like a good idea." She didn't want to say that she didn't know where else to go, that Nina would probably just be upset by talk of a disappearance, but it was the truth.

That would explain a lot, then. That he didn't show up somewhere on someone's doorstep drunk after all the crap he dealt with was probably a small miracle.

"Sounds like a good reason to get drunk to me," he said, because 'sorry' never felt like the right thing to say with this. He hated every sorry he got when people had disappeared on him, even though he knew they were only trying to be supportive. "Anyone I know?"

Lily almost laughed at that and managed to muffle it by taking a sip of the drink she'd carried all the way from the Winchester to Jeff's place. Maybe. He was one of the other guys I'm sleeping with probably wasn't the best answer she could give to that question and so she shook her head, then shrugged, because for all she knew, they'd at least known each other well enough to say hello. Eames hadn't been a particularly social guy that she'd noticed, but she didn't know everyone he was friends with by a long shot.

"Eames," she said. "British guy, not as tall as you." One of the people who'd somehow, unexpectedly, become her friends. One of the people she'd grown to care for quite a bit, one of the people she only wanted to see happy.

He briefly wondered if it made him an ass that he was just glad the name rang no bells. He didn't even consider asking what he was to her, not that he'd actually care what her answer was to that.

"Never met him," he said, in case she was wondering. He doubted she would actually care. He knew when he was dealing with this crap, he pretty much only focused on himself. Glancing over at her after a moment, he asked, "This the first time this happened to you?"

"No, there was Thomas," she answered, though she hadn't had much of a problem with that. Realistically, Lily knew it was better for Nina if Thomas was nowhere around and since she only wanted good things for Nina, it made sense to not want him around much.

"The artistic director of the company I worked for," she explained. "But he was sort of a prick at the worst of times and just kind of creepy at the best of times, so, you know..." Trailing off, she shrugged to indicate that losing him hadn't been that bad, which was cruel of her, but honest. "But I guess it's the first time it's been someone I really... someone I liked having around."

Jeff got that. Really, he was able to shrug off the disappearances up to Britta (and then Annie), if he was completely honest with himself.

"You ever wonder why we're even stuck here?" he asked after a moment, tilting his head back to rest against the wall his couch was against. He wasn't really expecting a great answer to that from her - he didn't have any and he was sober. Every single time someone disappeared, it was pretty much the forefront thought in his head. It made no sense - he legitimately wanted to leave most days, even if it sent him into the waiting arms of Greendale, so shouldn't he have been gone a long time ago?

"No," Lily answered honestly, turning sideways on the couch to face Jeff, her legs tucked under her body. She set the drink on her knee, holding it balanced there as she thought about what he was asking her.

"I was having a great time here. It's not the best place in the world for dancing, but I can still do it here. I have friends, I have good food, free drinks, at least one handsome man who's willing to show me a good time," she said, smiling at him faintly. "I guess I didn't care why we were here when it was good and now... I don't know. Now I'm just drunk and sort of pissed off. I probably wouldn't even have a good answer if I was sober and happy."

"I think about it sometimes," he said simply in response, not actually planning on going into what he usually thought about when he let his mind wander down that road. His mouth lifted into a small grin when she mentioned him as at least one good point about this place. "Getting drunk usually fixes that for me, too, actually. Distraction never hurts, either."

He's not entirely sure what she wants out of him right now. He figures mentioning it would be enough for her to get he was happy to offer distraction if she needed it.

For a moment, Lily watches him, because she isn't sure what she's looking for here either. She's come to him instead of anyone else because there's nothing about her relationship with Jeff that confuses her. He's as straightforward as anyone she's ever met and she appreciates that more than she can say. It makes being around him easy.

"Distraction never hurts," she agrees in a soft voice, shifting forward enough to press her mouth to his in a slow kiss. She's just drunk enough that it seems like a good idea, the best course of action. She'll drink and Jeff can help her forget.

March 12

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